About US|Disclaimer|Home

This is a daily reminder why we like it here!

Badvertisements 1 : Ads I really don’t get!

admin November 27th, 2008

Bad Slice!Good Slice! (+5 rating, 9 votes)
Loading ... Loading ...
774 views

If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

Within the crowded modern markets, modern market-ists certainly don’t have it easy. There’s so much information going around, so many people trying to sell their thing and build their profit, that sometimes advertisers engage some desperate stunts to try and stand out from the crowd. Needless to say, in certain occasions some ads effectively succeed in doing so, but for all the wrong reasons.

real juicy beef

Have you ever come across a publicity that left you utterly puzzled and confused, all the while thinking “Were they actually trying to sell me on something or just chase me away? Are they trying to confuse me?”.

I certainly have thought so, and in fact it’s been happening so often that I decided to put together a list of my favorite BADVERTISEMENTS out there, so you can take your best shot at guessing what the hell it’s all about.

 

Let’s start with this bunch from OSO, a brand of food wrap. Okay, so they’re trying to tell us that if we don’t buy their product… our food will try to do stupid things? Shouldn’t the slogan read “If you don’t buy this, your food will try to kill itself in moronic fashion!”, or something like that? I’m really lost, here.

OSO Badvertisement

OSO Badvertisement

OSO Badvertisement

 

Okay, so next we have this brillian set from Aquafresh. In fact, it’s so brilliant that you’ll have to wear a cap to keep from getting bedazzled? My, those people certainly can come up with some far-fetched metaphors. I just hope the toothpaste is better… or are those people trying to hide their teeth because they don’t want us to see something terrible? Go figure.

Aquafresh Badvertisement

Aquafresh Badvertisement

Aquafresh Badvertisement

 

Now, we should take a break from all the giggling and making fun of  the questionable judgement which has been so outstandindly exibited by the previous advertisers. So if you want to kick back in great style, feel free to join me in one of those amazing AUDI seats right over there in the middle of this theatre… of badvertisements?

Audi Badvertisement

 

 

There must be some kind of a trend in antrophomophic food lately that I hadn’t noticed before. I mean, how else could you explain the following campaign, where Heinz Beans tries to convince us that our snacks will go nuts unless we buy those beans? What if I don’t even like beans, does that mean I’ll get antropomorphic food poisoning and go coo-cucko? God only knows… and Heinz.

heinz beans Badvertisement

heinz beans Badvertisement

heinz beans Badvertisement

 

Now if  you’re thirsty from all the antropomorphic food you’ve had lately, why not grab a can of burn? I mean, just look how much it’ll hurt too pee and pass bowels after you’ve had this beverage. I’m talking EXCRUCIATING pain, as these ads so beautifully demonstrate. Isn’t that clever?

real beef

real beef

 

We’ve been spending a lot of cash eating out lately, so maybe it’s time we’d check our credit. Now before we take control of our finances, we just need to locate our motorcycle and … what is that crazy folk doing, anyway?

real beef

 

I don’t know about you, but the only thing I like better than antropomorphic food is potentially poisonous food! I paticularly enjoy it when a brand of soap tries to coax me into eating such food with some kind of bizarre sublimal pictures… wow, isn’t that FAB!

real beef

real beef

real beef

 

Whoa… maybe we should just head out towards the market and get us some real, non-antropomorphic and non-toxic-looking food, don’t you think so? So you want to check out Calgary Farmers Market, eh? Oh, I’m not sure… I know they say that’s as fresh as it gets… but sometimes I wonder if they meant “as FREAKY as it gets”! Hot damn, you can’t even trust food nowadays.

 

real beef

real beef

real beef

 

Speaking of food you can’t trust, it was about time we’d hear back from our good old friend Heinz the Ketchup: now in such a smokin’ hot variety, that it’ll actually burn your fries to cinders… hm, such a unique ashy flavor. Too bad I just lost my appetite. 

real beef

 

Having lost my appetite, I might as well try to make some random terrorist attacks or otherwise send out some messages in a bottle. All good chances to vent out on the frustations brought about by some of our finest contemporary Badvertisements… ah, and so the circle is drawn. 

real beef

real beef

 

Now that we’ve done our thing, let’s just act like total punks and piss right against the wall. Why care about others wellbeing, when you can just do it? Nike says you can!  

just do it... punk!

 

Just a word of advice for the wise… if you ever feel such that you act out the following pictures, don’t just settle for taking a panadol. You’ll actually need to open your eyes or come to your senses, because you should have noticed you spill a freaking pile of salt in your soup and you tried to have a little too much coffee with your sugar!

just do it... punk!

just do it... punk!

 

 Now that we’re back to normal, why not get a little baking done… as in pastry, mind you. To that effect, we can use one of those nifty mixers from Planetaria? It looks they have a double function of splashing your unwanted visitors… isn’t that something? Talk about artificial intelligence! Or maybe they just couldn’t keep those blenders from spilling and they’re trying to sell us on “creative applications” that will take advantage of the unique flaws in their product design.

 

 

planetaria!"

planetaria!

planetaria!

 

Waking up in early in the morning to get to work can be an annoying experience. But Seiko has figured out a way of making such experience go beyond unpleasant until it gets outright painful. Who doesn’t love to wake up with a good physical schock, anyway?

 seiko will get your spirits up

seiko will get your spirits up

seiko will get your spirits up

 

Finally, a simple answer to one of the greatest riddles in the universe: why should all man be terrified with any female purse? Here’s the answer, courtesy of Badvertisement! 

got tara?

got tara?

got tara?

 

That’s it, folks! If you can’t have enough of this juicy beef, stay tuned for the second part of our Badvertisement special: “Badvertisements 2: I get it, but I still don’t like it!.

real beef

Ps- Just to show that badvertisements are by no means a modern trend, I’ll leave you with these two fine specimens, featuring consummer-favorite scary mimes and dirty babies!

real beef

Drink our hot chocolate… otherwise our scary mime will chase you down the street… forever! AND you’ll have horrible nightmares too!

 

real beef

If your piglet baby really hates bathing… our soap really won’t make it easier for you! But you should buy it anyway, because we told you so!

Popularity: 5% [?]

Show us how deep is your love, and...

Check similar slices:
  • *** THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER WHY WE LIKE IT HERE! Your opinions and comments are welcome. ***

2 Responses to “Badvertisements 1 : Ads I really don’t get!”

  1. [...] you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!If you can’t get enough of Badvertisements, the kind of ads that make you go “Uh?”, today is your lucky day! I’ve joined [...]

  2. Aliceon 07 Jan 2009 at 11:22 am

    That image of the African boy peeing on a Nike wall is not an actual Nike advertisement. It’s a photograph by Sharad Haksar.

    Also you’re really gripping at straws with the “Hot Ketchup” ad. It’s a metaphor. There’s bad marketing and then there’s “I’m going to make fun of things just because I’m high and mighty behind my invisible internet persona”

Trackback URI | Comments RSS

Leave a Reply