Goodbye G. W. Bush: The Internets Won’t be As Fun Without You!

To every coin there are two sides. Let’s consider this, for example; in one side, it’s great news the presidential run of George W. Bush Jr. is finally over, since his absence is equated by most as a good chance the USA will finally get out from the dark pits of recession. On the other side…

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

Next: his finest moments!

… well, the Internet just won’t be as fun, now that such an influential and far-reaching comedian has been removed from the spotlight. With this in mind, I decided to make one last homage, with some of the top highlights and Bushisms illustrating his remarkable and illustrious political career. And i quote:


bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I promise you I will listen to what has been said here, even though I wasn’t here.” —at the President’s Economic Forum in Waco, Texas, Aug. 13, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.” —Townsend, Tenn., Feb. 21, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“We both use Colgate toothpaste.” —after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“Tribal sovereignty means that; it’s sovereign. I mean, you’re a — you’ve been given sovereignty, and you’re viewed as a sovereign entity. And therefore the relationship between the federal government and tribes is one between sovereign entities.” —Washington, D.C., Aug. 6, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I glance at the headlines just to kind of get a flavor for what’s moving. I rarely read the stories, and get briefed by people who are probably read the news themselves.” —Washington, D.C., Sept. 21, 2003

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorize himself.” —Grand Rapids, Mich., Jan. 29, 2003

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I hear there’s rumors on the Internets that we’re going to have a draft.” —presidential debate, St. Louis, Mo., Oct. 8, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“This foreign policy stuff is a little frustrating.” —as quoted by the New York Daily News, April 23, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.” —Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“For every fatal shooting, there were roughly three non-fatal shootings. And, folks, this is unacceptable in America. It’s just unacceptable. And we’re going to do something about it.” —Philadelphia, Penn., May 14, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I’m the master of low expectations. I’m also not very analytical. You know I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things.” —aboard Air Force One, June 4, 2003

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe — I believe what I believe is right.” —Rome, Italy, July 22, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“People say, how can I help on this war against terror? How can I fight evil? You can do so by mentoring a child; by going into a shut-in’s house and say I love you.” —Washington, D.C., Sept. 19, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I wish you’d have given me this written question ahead of time so I could plan for it…I’m sure something will pop into my head here in the midst of this press conference, with all the pressure of trying to come up with answer, but it hadn’t yet….I don’t want to sound like I have made no mistakes. I’m confident I have. I just haven’t — you just put me under the spot here, and maybe I’m not as quick on my feet as I should be in coming up with one.” —President George W. Bush, after being asked to name the biggest mistake he had made, Washington, D.C., April 3, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“The really rich people figure out how to dodge taxes anyway.” —explaining why high taxes on the rich are a failed strategy, Annandale, Va., Aug. 9, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“My plan reduces the national debt, and fast. So fast, in fact, that economists worry that we’re going to run out of debt to retire.” —radio address, Feb. 24, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“See, free nations are peaceful nations. Free nations don’t attack each other. Free nations don’t develop weapons of mass destruction.” —Milwaukee, Wis., Oct. 3, 2003

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“In Iraq, no doubt about it, it’s tough. It’s hard work. It’s incredibly hard.” —repeating the phrases “hard work,” “working hard,” “hard choices,” and other “hard”-based verbiage 22 times in his first debate with Sen. John Kerry

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him.” —Washington, D.C., Sept. 13, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I don’t know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don’t care. It’s not that important. It’s not our priority.” —Washington, D.C., March 13, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“But all in all, it’s been a fabulous year for Laura and me.” —summing up his first year in office, three months after the 9/11 attacks, Washington, D.C., Dec. 20, 2001

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I try to go for longer runs, but it’s tough around here at the White House on the outdoor track. It’s sad that I can’t run longer. It’s one of the saddest things about the presidency.” —interview with “Runners World,” Aug. 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“Can we win? I don’t think you can win it.” —after being asked whether the war on terror was winnable, “Today” show interview, Aug. 30, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we’re really talking about peace.” —Washington, D.C. June 18, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn’t do my job.” —to a group of Amish he met with privately, July 9, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“We found the weapons of mass destruction. We found biological laboratories … And we’ll find more weapons as time goes on. But for those who say we haven’t found the banned manufacturing devices or banned weapons, they’re wrong, we found them.” —Washington, D.C., May 30, 2003

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“Those weapons of mass destruction have got to be somewhere!” —President George W. Bush, joking about his administration’s failure to find WMDs in Iraq as he narrated a comic slideshow during the Radio & TV Correspondents’ Association dinner, Washington, D.C., March 24, 2004

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“If this were a dictatorship, it’d be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I’m the dictator.” —Washington, D.C., Dec. 19, 2000

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee — I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again.” —Nashville, Tenn., Sept. 17, 2002

bush doing what he does best... stupid is as bush does

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” —Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004